Valdron's Handy Dandy Standard Disclaimer, adapted: Enterprise, the series, concepts and characters, are the property, copyright and trademark of Paramount/Viacom. No ownership or claim on said property, copyright or trademark is made or implied by the use in any content in the House of Tucker. This work constitutes a personal comment on the aforesaid properties pursuant to doctrines of fair use and fair comment. This work is non-commercial, not for sale or profit, and may not be sold or reproduced for commercial purposes.

Translation: We don't own Enterprise, Jonathan Archer, Trip Tucker, Malcolm Reed, Hoshi Sato, Travis Mayweather, Phlox, T'pol, or even the dog. We just like messing with their heads.