Download the full Season One TripQuotes File
Download the full Season Two TripQuotes File COMING IN LATE AUGUST

Or read it here, Ep-by-Ep

EPISODES 1-5 Shockwave (Part II), Carbon Creek, Minefield, Dead Stop, A Night in Sickbay
EPISODES 6-8 Marauders, The Seventh, The Communicator
EPISODES 9-11 Singularity, Vanishing Point, Precious Cargo
EPISODES 12-14 The Catwalk, Dawn, Stigma
EPISODES 15-17 Cease Fire, Future Tense, Canamar,
EPISODES 18-20 The Crossing, Judgment, Horizon
EPISODES 21-23 The Breach, Cogenitor, Regeneration
EPISODES 24-26 First Flight, Bounty, The Expanse


Vanishing Point
Precious Cargo

Season One Trip Quotes

Trip Swears


T’Pol (making a log entry): The symptoms began not long after we set a course for the trinary system. That was nearly two days ago.
On the bridge two days before:
Archer: You’re sure it’s a black hole?
T’Pol: A class four.
Archer: According to the Vulcan star charts your people have surveyed more than 2000 of these things.
T’Pol: That’s correct, but none of them were part of a trinary star system.
Archer: How close can we get?
T’Pol: The gravitational shear between the stars is extreme. We’d have to drop to impulse, but we should be able to approach to within 5 million kilometers.
Trip: Close enough to get some nice pictures.
Archer: How long would it take to reach the system at impulse?
T’Pol: Two days.
Archer: Set a course. Trip! If you’ve got some free time I’d love it if you would take a look at my chair.
Trip: Sir?
Archer: The Captain’s chair.
Trip: What about it?
Archer: You may have noticed that I don’t sit in it very much.
Trip: Is there a problem?
Archer: It’s uncomfortable. When I lean back I feel like I’m about to slide out of it. I have to sort of perch on the edge.
Trip: I always assumed it was the best seat in the house.
Archer: Take a look at it for me?
Trip: I was going to purge the impulse manifolds.
Archer: The chair, first, if you don’t mind.
Trip: Aye, aye, sir.
Bridge. Trip is drilling the Captain’s chair.
T’Pol: Commander…. …..Commander!
Trip (to assistant): Push it forward. That’s good hold it there.
T’Pol: Commander! (drilling noise stops) Perhaps you could finish that later.
Trip: This may not be as glamorous as a black hole, but the Cap’n gave me an order.
T’Pol: He also requested detailed censored readings of this trinary system.
Trip: I thought Vulcans had all this mental focus and discipline.
T’Pol: We also have sensitive hearing.
Trip: Huh. (resumes drilling noise)
T’Pol: I’ll be in my quarters.
Trip: We’ll let you know when we’re done.
Malcolm: “Condition Red”?
Trip: Huh?
Malcolm: What about “Condition Red” for the new security protocol?
Trip: Why don’t you just call it “Security Protocol”?
Malcolm: Well, that’s not very dynamic.
Trip: Do you think a cup holder’s too much?
Malcolm: Beg your pardon?
Trip: For the Cap’n’s chair. He just wanted the seat adjusted but I thought…as long as I’m workin’ on it…
Malcolm: Just what the Captain needs in a crisis, a place to rest his beverage!
Trip: I’m also upgrading the status displays. He’ll be to access tactical data from the arm rest.
Malcolm: If you really want to improve tactical readiness, why don’t you help me with this protocol?
Trip: I’m a little busy right now Malcolm
Malcolm: It’s a chair!
Trip: It’s the Captain’s chair. It’s just as important as your…”Reed Alert!”
Malcolm: “Reed Alert!” That’s not bad.
Hoshi: Enjoying your lunch?
Trip: Yeah, thanks, it was terrific.
Hoshi: It’s called “oden.” Every Japanese family has their own way of preparing it.
Trip: Well, it seems to be a big hit. Congratulations.
Hoshi: Thank you! Lieutenant, you’ve barely touched yours.
Malcolm: It was lovely.
Hoshi: I’ll get you a fresh bowl.
Malcolm: That’s not necessary.
Hoshi: It’s no problem.
Malcolm: Please, I’m not hungry.
Hoshi: Are you sure there’s nothing wrong with it?
Malcolm: Well, it was a bit salty.
Hoshi: Salty? Oh, it tastes fine.
Malcolm: Well, it just must be me then. Everyone seems to be enjoying it.
T’Pol: Come in.
Trip: Here’s your sensor interface. What’s the emergency.
T’Pol: This trinary system is emitting some unusual radiation. I’m trying to identify it.
Trip: You dragged me up here so you could identify radiation?
T’Pol: Correct.
Trip: You said it was urgent.
T’Pol: I said it was important.
Trip: Ah, I get it. You’re paying me back. Makin’ me jump through hoops because I was makin’ too much noise. Well, you’ll be happy to know I moved the Cap’n’s chair down to engineering so it’s nice and quiet on the bridge now.
T’Pol: I prefer to work here. (Trip nods and turns to leave) I’ll need your assistance with this.
Trip: Weren’t you listenin’ to me? I don’t have time to cater to your whims. You want to get your name immortalized in the Vulcan database, get someone else to help you do it.
T’Pol: Are you feeling all right, Commander?
Trip: I know you don’t think this chair is important, but you’re wrong. What’s the most critical component on this ship? The main computer? The warp reactor? Uh-uh, it’s the crew. And the most important member of the crew is the Cap’n. He makes life and death decisions every day and the last thing he needs to be thinkin’ in a critical situation is, “Gee, I wish this chair wasn’t such a pain in the ass!”
Malcolm: I’ve been working on the new security protocol. Obviously the reactor must be secured immediately during a tactical alert.
Trip: “Tactical Alert?”
Malcolm: I considered your suggestion “Reed Alert” but that seemed a bit narcissistic.
Trip: Hand me that hypospanner, will ya?
Malcolm: I’ve also been working on a new alert signal. Tell me what you think.
Malcolm: Or this one.
(different alarm)
Malcolm: Which do you prefer?
Trip: For what?
Malcolm: A tactical alert!
Trip: They both sound like a bag full of cats!
Malcolm: Well they were designed to get your attention!
Trip: I’ll look this over and get back to you.
Malcolm: I also need your help on an emergency shut down procedure for the EPS grid.
Trip: I said, I’ll get back to ya!
Malcolm: Fine, let’s hope we don’t suffer a catastrophic reactor breech in the meantime.
Trip: Malcolm! One of your boys borrowed my laser micrometer. If you’re headed to the armory, could you get it back for me?
Archer: What happened to my chair?
Trip: Did you know that this chair is the exact same model used on Neptune-Class survey ships?
Archer: Is that why you called me down here?
Trip: Enterprise is the first warp 5 vessel in human history. The pride of the fleet! And your sittin’ in a chair they’ve been usin’ on warp 2 ships for over a decade! You deserve better. So I’m startin’ from scratch. I’m goin’ to build you a throne! Stand right there! I need to get a few parametric scans to get your exact dimensions. This baby is goin’ to fit like a glove.
Archer: Isn’t that used for aligning phase coils?
Trip: You won’t feel a thing!
Archer: Long as I’m down here, maybe I can get your opinion.
Trip: Don’t move!
Archer starts spouting about his father.
Trip: Turn around.
Archer: If so, then no man since Zephram Cochrane himself has made a more lasting contribution to the future of human-kind, than my father, Dr. Henry Archer.
Trip: All done!
Archer: What do you think?
Trip: Sounds good.
Archer: Let me read you the rest.
Trip: I really need to get to work on this.
Archer: Just a few more pages.
Trip: How many more.
Archer: Nineteen!
Trip: Nineteen?! Are you writin’ the preface or the book?
Archer: I’ve got a lot to say!
Trip: No kiddin’?!
Archer: What’s that supposed to mean?
Trip: Well if I may sir, it’s a little long-winded.
Archer: You’re lucky you’re a decent engineer, because you obviously don’t know anything about writing!
Trip: I’m not the only one.
Archer: Report.
Malcolm: The crew’s response was unacceptable. 38% of them failed to report to their stations. Critical systems haven’t been secured. I haven’t even heard from engineering.
Archer: Shut off that damn noise. Shut it off! I don’t recall authorizing a tactical drill.
Malcolm: Well it wouldn’t be much of a drill if everyone knew about it…sir. One minute and fifteen seconds.
Archer: What?
Malcolm: It took you one minute and fifteen seconds to reach your post. I would have expected more of our commanding officer given that the crew just might follow his example.
Trip: Cap’n!
Malcolm: One minute and 49 seconds. (Trip give Malcolm “the look”)
Trip: You might want to see this, sir! Interactive status displays, secondary helm control, it’s even got inertial microdampers. The ship could be shakin’ apart and you’d hardly feel a thing.
Malcolm: You ignored a tactical alert for this!
Trip: I want to run some colors by you for the headrest.
Malcolm: This is all a big joke to you!
Trip: Give it a rest!
Malcolm: This isn’t a bloody pleasure cruise! Without proper discipline on this ship, this mission is doomed.
Trip: Why don’t you go play soldier somewhere else?
Malcolm: If this were a military situation, you’d be taken out and shot! (Trip grabs Malcolm and a scuffle ensues.)
Archer: Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey! (To Trip) I don’t care what color the headrest is or whether it can serve me iced tea! I just want a place to sit when I’m on duty! (To Malcolm) And if I hear that alert one more time, I may take you taken out and have you shot. (To T’Pol) Unless there is a real emergency, like a reactor breech, I don’t want to be disturbed.
Trip (awakes): Did we get some nice pictures of the black hole?
Trip has finished re-aligning the Captain’s chair:
Archer: Doesn’t look any different to me.
Trip: Give it a try.
Archer: Hmm….It feels better. What did you do?
Trip: Cross your legs.
Archer: What did you do? Seems totally different.
Trip: I lowered it…by one centimeter.
Archer (laughs): That’s all?
Trip: Didn’t have time to install the new status displays or the intertial microdampers, but.. ah… you give me a couple of days…
Archer: I think this will be fine, Commander, thanks!
Trip: How about I just attach the cup holder?
Archer: This will be fine.
(Trip goes to the elevator and give Archer the thumbs up. Archer returns the gesture)


Vanishing Point

Hoshi: These are at least 300 years older than the ones in the last chamber.
Trip: You sure you can’t read any of this?
Hoshi: Nope! How about you?
Trip: Well, I think this says “tall guys are popular.”
Hoshi: Hmm, you’re a budding linguist. Let’s get a shot of that one. I wonder what happened to them.
Trip: It is kind of weird. Not a single biosign on the entire planet. (comm. beeps) Tucker.
Archer: You about to finish down there, Trip?
Trip: You can’t believe these ruins, sir. We’ve been through 2 dozen chambers. No tellin’ now many more there are.
Archer: I’m afraid you’re not going to find out today. That storm we told you about hasn’t changed course. You and Hoshi are going to need to get back to Enterprise.
Trip: We’ll just finish up with Mr. Tall and Popular. We should be back at the shuttlepod in 5, 6 minutes.
Archer: Don’t take any longer than that. Archer out.
Trip: Ah, ladies first.
Hoshi: Have you ever done this?
Trip: No, but the Cap’n has, and Malcolm did it twice. They said there’s nothing to it.
Hoshi: Your molecules get pulled apart.
Trip: Then they get put back together again.
Hoshi: Do you know how many molecules you’re made up of?
Trip: Lots.
Hoshi: All right, how many?
Trip: A few trillion!
Hoshi: That’s a pretty big jigsaw puzzle. What if some of the pieces put in the wrong place? You know I’ll bet a lot of them look real similar.
Trip: Starfleet says it’s safe. That’s good enough for me.
Malcolm, Trip, and Travis eating and laughing together:
Malcolm: …so he tells her it was merely a “warp imbalance.”
Trip: That is a lie, Malcolm.
Malcolm: We all heard it Commander. There’s no use pretending.
Trip: Come on, Travis. Don’t you think a Vulcan would see right through that?
Hoshi: Anyone sitting here?
Travis: But that’s what you said, though!
Hoshi: Is anyone sitting here?
Trip (hearing Hoshi’s question): No. Please.
Travis: So what was it like?
Malcolm: Travis! Let her eat her supper!
Hoshi: It was very unsettling. Didn’t you find it unsettling?
Trip: Well, for a minute or two, but once I counted my fingers and toes…
Hoshi: I don’t know. I still don’t feel right.
Trip: Oh, it was probably that storm. You don’t forget things like that too quickly.
Hoshi: Not the storms…it’s the transporter. I don’t feel like myself since I went through it. I need to check the medical database and find out to the people they used when they were testing that thing?
Malcolm: You mean other than Cyrus Ramsey?
Hoshi: Cyrus Ramsey?
Trip: Ah, don’t tell me you don’t know about poor Cyrus.
Hoshi: Am I supposed to?
Travis: You can’t go on a survival overnight without hearing a story about someone seeing Ramsey’s molecules rematerializing on a foggy night.
Trip: Hmm.
Hoshi: What happened to him?
Trip: Next thing you’ll tell us is that you never heard of the Easter bunny!
Hoshi: What happened to him?
Trip: Madison, Wisconsin, May, I think, 2146. He was the test subject for the first long range transport. Just 100 meters. Something went wrong with the pattern buffer. He never rematerialized.
Malcolm: Come on, Hoshi. Everybody’s heard of Cyrus Ramsey!
Hoshi: I must have fallen asleep before the ghost stories.
Trip: Where did you do your survival training?
Travis: Death Valley, California. Middle of July, naturally. You?
Trip: Cap’n and I were in the same group. Alice Springs, Australia. Never saw so many flies in my life. Bitin’ kind. (Trip pulls out communicator and speaks into it: ) Tucker.
Archer: Storms breaking up. I don’t think we’ll have any trouble getting you back down in the morning.
Trip: Travis was just tellin’ me he’d like to see the ruins.
Archer: Well I don’t think Hoshi will be joining you.
Trip: I’ll need a pilot to bring the other pod back.
Archer: Travis it is. I’ll see you both in the morning. Archer out.
Trip: Never say I don’t say I don’t take you anywhere.
Travis: You don’t take me anywhere!
Laughter from Trip, Malcolm, and Travis as they leave Hoshi sitting alone.
Hoshi (to empty space): See you later.
Trip: You’re upside down, Ensign!
Hoshi: I was taught never to contradict a superior officer. The Captain told me what happened. Did they treat you all right?
Trip: Didn’t even tie us up. As soon as the Cap’n promised to give them their stuff back, they walked us to the shuttlepods and away we went.
Hoshi: I’m sorry I wasn’t more helpful trying to translate. I don’t know what happened.
Trip: Well, we’re safe and sound. That’s all that matters. Have you tried this thing?
Hoshi: I get motion sickness, remember? Have you felt OK since we were transported yesterday?
Trip: Considerin’ that I’ve been back down to the surface, kidnapped, and released, I’ve probably had better days. Why, are you not feelin’ well?
Hoshi: I didn’t think I was, but the doctor seems to feel my symptoms are psychological.
Trip: What kind of symptoms?
Hoshi: I just haven’t been myself. Everything is a little off. Even the laws of physics.
Trip: Well, in that case, you’re right, you shouldn’t get on this thing! The laws of physics don’t apply here, either. Sorry, just tryin’ to cheer you up.
Hoshi: That’s OK. Phlox promises me I’ll be fine.
Trip: It’s going to be a while before any of us gets used to being taken apart and put back together again. It seems perfectly natural to be anxious about it.
Hoshi: I hope it’s just a question of being anxious.
Trip: What else could it be?
Hoshi: I saw my reflection become transparent. I saw water pass right through my hand. I’m not convinced that the transporter put me back the way its supposed to.
Trip: All the king’s horse and all the king’s men. I can see why you might image the universe unravellin’. If you’re afraid you haven’t been put back together right, why assume anything else makes sense? But if I were you I’d ask the Doc for a sedative. Nothin’ like crawlin’ into bed.
Hoshi: You men are all alike.
Trip: Ah, wait and see. A night’s sleep with do you a world of good.
Trip: It’s the secondary phase coils.
Archer: What about them?
Trip: They’re not aligning. They’re not perfectly synchronized. It must have happened right after I came up from the surface.
Phlox: If they’re not perfectly synchronized…?
T’Pol: The re-sequencing would start to dissipate. Within hours she’d lose cohesion.
Trip: She didn’t want to go first. I told her I wouldn’t leave her alone with that storm comin’, but she insisted on going second. She wanted to be sure it was workin’, that it was safe. I’m the one who should be missin’. I told her to go first. She should have listened to me.
Hoshi: It wasn’t your fault.
Archer: Take the transporter off-line and figure out what went wrong. Starfleet promised me this sort of thing wouldn’t happen.
Trip: Aye, Sir.
Phlox: There’s no way to be certain this is her.
Trip: Is it Hoshi’s DNA or isn’t it?
Phlox: It’s difficult to tell. The amino acids have broken down.
Hoshi: Don’t waste your time. It’s not me.
Trip: The internal scan said access shaft B-7. She’s got to be here somewhere.
Hoshi: If you’d spend a little more time trying to figure out what happened….
Alien speaking.
Trip’s voice: What’s the problem.
Reed’s voice: The stream’s too unstable.
Hoshi: Lieutenant?
Trip’s voice: It’s easy as one, two….
Trip: Here Doc, over here. What do you think?
Phlox: Try isolating the dipeptides. Now run a comparison with her genetic profile.
Trip: Why would she have come down here?
Phlox: I doubt we’ll ever know, Commander. Now Captain Archer will want Hoshi’s parents to have this. They’re both alive, aren’t they?
Trip: Yeah. Both alive. You go ahead, Doc. I’m going to stick around for a minute.
Phlox: I understand.
Trip: Hoshi.
Hoshi: You can see me?
Trip: I should’ve made you go first. What could I have been thinking leaving you down there. I was the ranking officer. I had no business leaving a subordinate in the path of those storms. Why didn’t you listen to me. I told you we’d be safe. And now look what you’ve done.


Precious Cargo

Archer: This is Subcommander T’Pol and my Chief Engineer, Commander Tucker.
Plinn: Our salvation.
Trip: The Cap’n said something about life-support.
Goff: We were hired to return a young woman to her home world. A few days ago her stasis pod began to malfunction.
Archer: Stasis? Is she injured?
Goff: No, no, she’s a passenger. But our ship is designed to haul cargo, not people, and it’s a very long journey. Putting her in suspended animation was our only choice.
Plinn: We have another 5 months ahead of us. If she wakes up, there won’t be enough food, air to breathe. If we’re forced to abort the mission, we won’t get…paid.
T’Pol: Commander Tucker is resourceful. I’m sure he’ll be able to assist you.
Trip: Mind if I have a look?
Plinn: Please.
Hoshi: Who is she? Any idea?
Trip: I asked Plinn but he doesn’t seem to know too much about her. Said something about studying medicine in a research colony.
Hoshi: A doctor?
Trip: I suppose so. She must have a real passion for it if she is willing to go through all this. Shame we’ll never get to meet her.
Hoshi: It’s not polite to stare, Commander.
Trip: What’s that supposed to mean?
Hoshi: Let me know if you have any problems with that translation.
Trip: I wasn’t starin’!
Kaitaama: I am their prisoner. I was returning from a diplomatic mission when they attacked my transport, murdered my guards. You don’t know who am I, do you?
Trip: Should I?
Kaitaama: My family is known on hundreds of worlds.
Trip: Well, I’m afraid Earth isn’t one of them. I take it you aren’t a doctor.
Kaitaama: I’m First Monarch of the Sovereign Dynasty of Krios Prime.
Trip: Oh. Charles Tucker III. Pleased to meet you. So what do these guys want?
Kaitaama: Ransom. No doubt they’ll demand a high price for my safe return.
Trip: Listen, my cap’n will be lookin’ for me. All we have to do is get off this ship and let him know where we are.
Trip: Could you hand me that circuit probe? The one with the green…handle? You must be one hell of a diplomat.
Kaitaama: Is your entire species so ill mannered?
Trip: No…just me.
Kaitaama hesitates:
Trip: We don’t have all day.
Kaitaama: This is meant for one person.
Trip: We’ll have to make do. Unless you know how to fly one of these things?
Kaitaama: What do you propose we do next?
Trip: To be honest, I hadn’t really thought about it.
Kaitaama: I assumed you had a plan!
Trip: I was only joking. They do have a sense of humor where you come from?
Kaitaama: Among the commoners. Only joking.
Kaitaama: You’re touching me!
Trip: I’m afraid I don’t have much choice.
Kaitaama: It’s inappropriate to touch the First Monarch.
Trip: You’re welcome to step outside until I’m done. Excuse me. There we go. Main thrusters. Oh, no, wait, they’re stabilizers.
Kaitaama: You have no idea how to control this vehicle.
Trip: I’m workin’ on it.
Kaitaama: Even if we do find a breathable atmosphere and you manage to land without killing us, what will we do about food? Water? There could be hostile life forms on the surface. How will we protect ourselves?
Trip: Look, I’ve got less than 24 hours to figure out how to scan a star system and program a descent sequence in a language I don’t understand. And I’m not goin’ to get it done with you interrupting me every 5 seconds. So, I’d appreciate it if you’d keep quiet until I’m finished. Now, lift your butt.
Kaitaama: My what?
Trip: Your behind, your rear end. I haven’t checked that panel yet.
Kaitaama: Quickly.
Trip: You know, you were a lot more pleasant in stasis. I think I found the landing thrusters. I understand how difficult this must be for someone of your upbringing. But we’re could be stuck out here for a while. We should find a way to get along. I’m willin’ to give it a try if you are.
Kaitaama: My hand. You’re sitting on my hand. I’ll try.
Kaitaama: Is it edible?
Trip: Well, depends how hungry you are. (looks around escape pod) Reminds me of my first car.
Kaitaama: Car?
Trip: A four-wheel vehicle. Wasn’t much bigger than this. All we’re missin’ is the ocean breeze comin’ off the Gulf. I used to drive out to a place called Chatkin Point, park along the shore line and…ah…stare at the moon with my girlfriend. Don’t worry, I won’t make a pass at you.
Kaitaama: The Sovereign Guard would cut off one of your hands.
Trip: Ah, you must be a fun date.
Trip: That’s the best you can do.
Kaitaama: There’s very little dry wood.
Trip: Keep lookin’. What are you waitin’ for?
Kaitaama: I’m not your servant. You’re the one who was raised in a primitive environment. You find the wood!
Trip: What’s that supposed to mean?
Kaitaama: You’re obviously better suited to physical labor.
Trip: In case you haven’t noticed, we’re not in a palace. You said it yourself, you won’t survive without my help. So it seems to me that I’m the one in charge, the king of the swamp. Now get your ass out there. Don’t come back without an armful of dry wood!
Kaitaama: I should have you imprisoned for speaking to me that way.
Trip: You should give me a medal. You’d be dead if it weren’t for me.
Kaitaama: I’m beginning to think that would be preferable!
Trip: I doubt the commoners back home would complain.
(Kaitaama takes swing at him and two roll into water.)
Kaitaama: How dare you?
Trip: You’re the one who took a swing at me!
Kaitaama: You insulted the First Monarch.
Trip: I’m just a petty commoner, remember, raised on a primitive….
Kaitaama kisses Trip and…
Archer: Trip? This a bad time?



Characters owned by Paramount (please read our disclaimer). Primary content by Archer4Trip unless otherwise stated, with assistance from Myst123, evay, Lo Pan, srtrekker, and many others.